Scripture says, "Submit yourselves one to another." It also says "submit yourselves to your elders." These are two different statements.
The first statement addresses the sovereignty of each human individual, which means that ultimately each person is responsible for his or her own life, and that each person cannot be judged or forced to adapt to another's lifestyle. Each person has every right to make whatever choice they want, and if another person doesn't like it, they have no right to violate that person's sovereignty in order to force compliance with an external theology, set of rules, or expression.
The second statement addresses authority, in which a sovereign human may choose to submit a part of their lives to another sovereign human in order to learn from them, receive wisdom and revelation from them, and relate to them in love. This submission to authority should in no way violate sovereignty as it is the choice of the one who submits to submit, for how long, and in what way.
One example of submission to authority is that of child to parents. The child does not have the resources to care for themselves or the worldview to attain those resources or even know what they are. Trusting the parents to provide for their physical, mental, emotional, and social needs, the children submit to their parents so that they can practically co-exist in a family, so that they can learn what their needs and resources are and how to get them, and ultimately so that they can grow into healthy human beings who can not only provide for themselves all that they need to survive and succeed in life, but also provide for others--their own children--someday.
There's a reason the word discipline comes from "disciple" or the Latin word for "student." Discipline is teaching, not punishment, and isn't punitive. Punitive implies that a person didn't have the right to choose something other than the authority's choice. When a parent disciplines a child, it is not to force compliance or mandate subservience, it is ultimately so that the child can learn self-governance, cause-and-effect, and how to make healthy choices. It is because the parent loves their child. The ultimate goal of the parent is for the child to grow up, and at some point the parent releases their right to discipline their child as they relinquish the reins of the grown child's life to them fully. The parent, having an adult view of the world, changes the way they teach (discipline) their child as the child grows, matures, and demonstrates understanding of life lessons.
As a teacher, I've seen many parent-child interactions. This authority, sadly, can become abusive in ways ranging from the most horrendously violent to the emotional manipulation of "if you don't live your life the way I think you should, I won't love you/support you/help you/etc." All of these are traumatizing and a violation of the sovereignty of the child. In no way can the parent command subservience of the child's sovereignty and that be considered healthy. There are some religions who use the phrase "honor thy father and thy mother" to try to say that a parent can do whatever they want in a child's life and the child must submit. That is not the heart of Yahweh.
As a teacher, I have authority over 20-30 teenagers at one time in one room that, trust me, seems VERY small when said 20-30 teenagers are all talking at once... usually while I'm giving directions. In the same way, I am there to provide education and growth for people who don't have the experience I have yet or the framework/grid to understand what it means to be an adult and responsible for your own needs and those of others. When I discipline my students, it is so that they can learn self-control and how to make healthy choices. It is because I do have a wider framework view of society and the world as a whole. It is because I love them and want what's best for them.
However, what is best for them is not necessarily what I think is best for them. Perhaps some of my students don't want to go to college. Maybe some don't even want to go to trade school. Some children will be much happier working hard, physical labor for the rest of their lives. Others would thrive in upper academia and feel completely unfulfilled if they didn't explore the depths of a collegiate field of study. I don't get to decide that; they do. What I can do is tell them that, because they don't yet know everything that's out there, they want to leave all options open to themselves. I can teach them that, even if they're never going to get any type of certificate or degree after high school graduation, being responsible and honoring commitments is important. Whatever job they have will have deadlines, so it's a good idea to practice turning in homework.
In no way do I attach the value of my students to the work ethic they have or quality of work they turn in. And yet I must explain to them the cause and effect of what happens if they do their work or do not do their work without using guilt, shame, or fear as a motivator. This is the healthiest way I know to take authority in my classroom without violating the sovereignty of the humans who are younger than me and are in my care.
In the adult-child authority structure, the ultimate goal is for the child to mature into a healthy adult. Parents must learn to let their adult children make their own choices. Once my eighth graders move on to ninth grade, I no longer have the authority to require homework, give grades and feedback, or even give advice. Now, if I've established a sense of trust and love--a healthy relationship with my students--they will email and message me to ask for advice (and I love it!), but I give it without right to demand compliance. Eventually, we become peers instead of having an authority relationship. I will always be older than them, and so always have a different view of the world, but that will not mean I will have more wisdom than they do for every situation, and that never meant I had more wisdom or sovereignty for their lives.
Not every situation of authority will be between adults and children, however. There are many situations where adults submit to each other. Sometimes that is because an adult wants to learn something from another adult, as in cases where they take classes. Yoga instruction, piano lessons, learning a second language, night school, college, etc. All of these are basically contracts between two adults in which one (the learner) agrees to submit to another (the teacher) in order to gain wisdom, knowledge, and experience in an area. Just like with my students in my classroom, this has the same goal of the learner growing up and moving on, becoming experts themselves in the subject matter. Often, adults might choose to quit before that expertise is achieved. This is their sovereign right. They must decide if the experience is worth the discipline necessary to attain it.
Sometimes adults submit to other adults for organizational purposes. In a company, in the workplace, in the military, there is a hierarchy that is born of practicality. Not everyone can be the boss. Not everyone would even want to be the boss if they knew what that entailed. It is necessary to have people doing jobs at all levels in a hierarchical structure. It is also necessary that, even here, sovereignty not be violated. First of all, there is no greater or lesser value to any position in a hierarchy save that of choice. I don't want to be principal right now. If I did, I'd be getting a Masters in Educational Leadership. However I know that working as a teacher is very different than working as a principal, and if I decided to be a principal, I'd have to give up being a teacher. Since I like where I am, I choose to submit to my principals in their running of our school. That is my choice as I am sovereign. I have chosen to value the position of teacher and to work in the awesome school that I work at.
A person in any organizational hierarchy has the choice to be in that hierarchy or leave it. That is their sovereignty. They also deserve to be treated as essential parts of the overall organization, they deserve to be respected, and they deserve to be heard. This is true in every hierarchy no matter what position is taken. The value of the person and their ideas is unaltered by their "place in the totem pole." This type of authority is purely logistical and should not violate sovereignty by abusing, overworking, or undervaluing any member of the organization. Indeed, as all people in this situation are adults, often the "lower man on the totem pole" has more wisdom in a certain area than the highest authority in the upper echelons of the organization. It would be sad to lose out on his wisdom because he was devalued due to his position in a hierarchy.
Ultimately, a human has a sovereign choice to submit to authority or not. That choice is always there, and has always been there. Never is there a moment when you as a human do not have a choice. It is often masked by guilt, shame, and fear. "If you don't______, (horrible thing) will happen!" But whether or not (horrible thing) happens, you can still choose to ____ or not to _______. Abusive authorities use guilt, shame, and fear to maintain their power. But if you see through it, you will remember your sovereignty and not be fooled.
Healthy authoritative relationships also incorporate sovereignty. This is the submission of one to another. This is where each member of the relationship has a respect for the sovereignty of each other member whether or not they are the authority. I value my students' sovereignty and I want to use my authority to help them make the most of that. I want them to discover their own sovereignty and self-love. I also value my own sovereignty and would not put myself in or allow myself to remain in an abusive authority situation now that I have discovered it.
We are all in authority and submitted to authority somehow. Healthy authority is subsequent to knowledge of sovereignty. Submit one to another, and then submit to the wisdom of the elders. Love is the foundation, relationship is the anchor of that foundation, but self-Love is the cornerstone and the first. Sovereignty is the cornerstone, authority comes after. I'm learning how to be in and submit healthfully to authority every day. I don't always know what it looks like, but I am certain that it starts with sovereignty.
The first statement addresses the sovereignty of each human individual, which means that ultimately each person is responsible for his or her own life, and that each person cannot be judged or forced to adapt to another's lifestyle. Each person has every right to make whatever choice they want, and if another person doesn't like it, they have no right to violate that person's sovereignty in order to force compliance with an external theology, set of rules, or expression.
The second statement addresses authority, in which a sovereign human may choose to submit a part of their lives to another sovereign human in order to learn from them, receive wisdom and revelation from them, and relate to them in love. This submission to authority should in no way violate sovereignty as it is the choice of the one who submits to submit, for how long, and in what way.
One example of submission to authority is that of child to parents. The child does not have the resources to care for themselves or the worldview to attain those resources or even know what they are. Trusting the parents to provide for their physical, mental, emotional, and social needs, the children submit to their parents so that they can practically co-exist in a family, so that they can learn what their needs and resources are and how to get them, and ultimately so that they can grow into healthy human beings who can not only provide for themselves all that they need to survive and succeed in life, but also provide for others--their own children--someday.
There's a reason the word discipline comes from "disciple" or the Latin word for "student." Discipline is teaching, not punishment, and isn't punitive. Punitive implies that a person didn't have the right to choose something other than the authority's choice. When a parent disciplines a child, it is not to force compliance or mandate subservience, it is ultimately so that the child can learn self-governance, cause-and-effect, and how to make healthy choices. It is because the parent loves their child. The ultimate goal of the parent is for the child to grow up, and at some point the parent releases their right to discipline their child as they relinquish the reins of the grown child's life to them fully. The parent, having an adult view of the world, changes the way they teach (discipline) their child as the child grows, matures, and demonstrates understanding of life lessons.
As a teacher, I've seen many parent-child interactions. This authority, sadly, can become abusive in ways ranging from the most horrendously violent to the emotional manipulation of "if you don't live your life the way I think you should, I won't love you/support you/help you/etc." All of these are traumatizing and a violation of the sovereignty of the child. In no way can the parent command subservience of the child's sovereignty and that be considered healthy. There are some religions who use the phrase "honor thy father and thy mother" to try to say that a parent can do whatever they want in a child's life and the child must submit. That is not the heart of Yahweh.
As a teacher, I have authority over 20-30 teenagers at one time in one room that, trust me, seems VERY small when said 20-30 teenagers are all talking at once... usually while I'm giving directions. In the same way, I am there to provide education and growth for people who don't have the experience I have yet or the framework/grid to understand what it means to be an adult and responsible for your own needs and those of others. When I discipline my students, it is so that they can learn self-control and how to make healthy choices. It is because I do have a wider framework view of society and the world as a whole. It is because I love them and want what's best for them.
However, what is best for them is not necessarily what I think is best for them. Perhaps some of my students don't want to go to college. Maybe some don't even want to go to trade school. Some children will be much happier working hard, physical labor for the rest of their lives. Others would thrive in upper academia and feel completely unfulfilled if they didn't explore the depths of a collegiate field of study. I don't get to decide that; they do. What I can do is tell them that, because they don't yet know everything that's out there, they want to leave all options open to themselves. I can teach them that, even if they're never going to get any type of certificate or degree after high school graduation, being responsible and honoring commitments is important. Whatever job they have will have deadlines, so it's a good idea to practice turning in homework.
In no way do I attach the value of my students to the work ethic they have or quality of work they turn in. And yet I must explain to them the cause and effect of what happens if they do their work or do not do their work without using guilt, shame, or fear as a motivator. This is the healthiest way I know to take authority in my classroom without violating the sovereignty of the humans who are younger than me and are in my care.
In the adult-child authority structure, the ultimate goal is for the child to mature into a healthy adult. Parents must learn to let their adult children make their own choices. Once my eighth graders move on to ninth grade, I no longer have the authority to require homework, give grades and feedback, or even give advice. Now, if I've established a sense of trust and love--a healthy relationship with my students--they will email and message me to ask for advice (and I love it!), but I give it without right to demand compliance. Eventually, we become peers instead of having an authority relationship. I will always be older than them, and so always have a different view of the world, but that will not mean I will have more wisdom than they do for every situation, and that never meant I had more wisdom or sovereignty for their lives.
Not every situation of authority will be between adults and children, however. There are many situations where adults submit to each other. Sometimes that is because an adult wants to learn something from another adult, as in cases where they take classes. Yoga instruction, piano lessons, learning a second language, night school, college, etc. All of these are basically contracts between two adults in which one (the learner) agrees to submit to another (the teacher) in order to gain wisdom, knowledge, and experience in an area. Just like with my students in my classroom, this has the same goal of the learner growing up and moving on, becoming experts themselves in the subject matter. Often, adults might choose to quit before that expertise is achieved. This is their sovereign right. They must decide if the experience is worth the discipline necessary to attain it.
Sometimes adults submit to other adults for organizational purposes. In a company, in the workplace, in the military, there is a hierarchy that is born of practicality. Not everyone can be the boss. Not everyone would even want to be the boss if they knew what that entailed. It is necessary to have people doing jobs at all levels in a hierarchical structure. It is also necessary that, even here, sovereignty not be violated. First of all, there is no greater or lesser value to any position in a hierarchy save that of choice. I don't want to be principal right now. If I did, I'd be getting a Masters in Educational Leadership. However I know that working as a teacher is very different than working as a principal, and if I decided to be a principal, I'd have to give up being a teacher. Since I like where I am, I choose to submit to my principals in their running of our school. That is my choice as I am sovereign. I have chosen to value the position of teacher and to work in the awesome school that I work at.
A person in any organizational hierarchy has the choice to be in that hierarchy or leave it. That is their sovereignty. They also deserve to be treated as essential parts of the overall organization, they deserve to be respected, and they deserve to be heard. This is true in every hierarchy no matter what position is taken. The value of the person and their ideas is unaltered by their "place in the totem pole." This type of authority is purely logistical and should not violate sovereignty by abusing, overworking, or undervaluing any member of the organization. Indeed, as all people in this situation are adults, often the "lower man on the totem pole" has more wisdom in a certain area than the highest authority in the upper echelons of the organization. It would be sad to lose out on his wisdom because he was devalued due to his position in a hierarchy.
Ultimately, a human has a sovereign choice to submit to authority or not. That choice is always there, and has always been there. Never is there a moment when you as a human do not have a choice. It is often masked by guilt, shame, and fear. "If you don't______, (horrible thing) will happen!" But whether or not (horrible thing) happens, you can still choose to ____ or not to _______. Abusive authorities use guilt, shame, and fear to maintain their power. But if you see through it, you will remember your sovereignty and not be fooled.
Healthy authoritative relationships also incorporate sovereignty. This is the submission of one to another. This is where each member of the relationship has a respect for the sovereignty of each other member whether or not they are the authority. I value my students' sovereignty and I want to use my authority to help them make the most of that. I want them to discover their own sovereignty and self-love. I also value my own sovereignty and would not put myself in or allow myself to remain in an abusive authority situation now that I have discovered it.
We are all in authority and submitted to authority somehow. Healthy authority is subsequent to knowledge of sovereignty. Submit one to another, and then submit to the wisdom of the elders. Love is the foundation, relationship is the anchor of that foundation, but self-Love is the cornerstone and the first. Sovereignty is the cornerstone, authority comes after. I'm learning how to be in and submit healthfully to authority every day. I don't always know what it looks like, but I am certain that it starts with sovereignty.
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